2011-2018 with Garrett
I’ve spent a considerable amount of time thinking about how I wanted to write this post. A couple people asked me about it, and even after all this time thinking about it, I still don’t know what to say. So I’m just going to write as it comes and from the heart.
Garrett and I met in Grand Rapids, when I was still living there. I always loved to go see music, and would frequent the venues that allowed students under 21. My friends would usually recognize a band and we would all rally and make a night of it.I happen to find myself talking to the opening band (Giant Panda Gorilla Dub Squad) when Garrett approached me and asked if I wanted to come on the bus with my friends. Even writing this I am smiling. His was (is) so suave, handsome grinning ear to ear, and tall. My first impressions. I also didn’t quite know he was the guy I just danced my booty off to for the last hour and a half. There isn’t much to say about that night, other than the fact that I was enamored from the moment he walked up to me. We said our good byes that night and met again the next year. The next year he was playing a festival my friends were planning on going to. I met up with him and of course all previous feelings I had toward him came flooding back. I guess you could say this was the start to on going relationship. I was still living in Michigan at this point, but flew to see him a couple times. It wasn’t until I moved to New York City after being scouted to be a model, that we really started dating. I was 18 at the time, and so overwhelmed with fast pace and newness of the big city. Garrett started taking me out, and taking me with him when he traveled. I never wanted to be apart. Of course, in all things in life, there were a few ugly hurtles we had to navigate. But I took the time to do some traveling on my own to London and France. I lived and thrived while I was away, but when I came back, our hearts needed to reconnect and we did once again. Eventually there would be Lewis. And then there was navigating an unexpected joy, and challenge. We quickly said good-bye to what life used to be and with compromise, patience, and grace were able to make it through the first year of Lewis’s life together as a family. I’d be lying if I said It was easy. It most certainly was not and we fought for eachother and the potential of a lovely family.
All relationships are different. So I don’t think I could say one particular thing that led us to where we are today. It was a combination of our personalities that seemed to equal each other out. . I fell in love with so much of his personality too. His dreams were my dreams. And as our dreams evolved, they evolved together and we were able to achieve them together.
Grace is a big attribute I think we both have. When one of us messes up, disagrees, or doesn’t live up to the other expectation, we practice grace. “It’s ok I love you”.
Confrontation is key. I think one thing that helps in our relationship is that we are completely honest with each other. If I feel a certain way, he’s going to know and vice versa. There is no underlying tension or things that are left unsaid. I think a civil argument is healthy. As long as you can agree to disagree, or eventually work it out.
Compromise. You’ve probably heard it before, and I’m saying it now! Compromise. Meet in the middle. Equals in relationships, equally compromise. I think I’m a little better than Garrett at this ;)
Attraction. Physical and spiritual. I was attracted to him then, and nothing has changed. People talk about a “fire”. I had that with Garrett. There was always something special about my attraction to him. The butterflies, the quickened pulse, cheesy smile plastered on my face when I’m around him. Never feeling like I have enough time with him. You know when you meet someone. At least I did. And you know they are the ones when none of these feelings go away.
Like I said, our story isn’t done being written yet. It’s not perfect, and it will always be work, but I hope that as we go through things in life, I can write about them and how we handle each one. Parenthood, moving, new endeavors, dreams, travel. Life..